Soul Crushing 101

I have one patient right now who is a grumpy old man. He's actually nice, and I'd probably be grumpy too when I'm 94 and recovering from massive cardiac surgery, but when it comes to therapy he's ridiculously grumpy. Ask him to put on his clothes and consider getting out of bed at 9 AM and you get an evil look. Hand him a 1.5 lb weight and tell him to do wrist curls and you get a muttered "Jesus Christ." He does not want to be in rehab, and we are sending him home ASAP, but until then we are locked in a battle of grumps.

Anyway, today I was shadowed by the new OT on the other rehab floor. (side note, when did I become qualified to educate other OTs??? time flies!!) For the record, she is tall and blond (and on a professional note, seems like she'll be a great OT!). She was sitting with me and Mr. Crabby while we were playing this balloon batting game (works on keeping your balance while you're standing, makes you work your arms a bit, AND Mr. Crabby was actually smiling and enjoying himself, though he'd never admit it). We take a break, and he looks at her and says, "I don't see any rings on your finger. How does a pretty girl like you not have anyone claiming you yet?"

Let's move beyond the obviously old-school sexism here and focus on what is clearly the soul crushing part. I have worked with this man 90 minutes a day for a week and a half, ringless for the entirety. Has he ever--EVER--wondered why I am still single? Certainly not aloud. But give him 5 minutes with Julia, and he's all about the flattery slash lechery.

Is it the blond thing? Is it the fact that she hasn't made him suffer through the indignity of getting up halfway through the morning, thus is not a horrible shrew, thus becomes a mystery as to why she hasn't caught a man? Or is it a "pretty" thing, and I have been found wanting even before he had the comparison to make?

In any case, my little internal vanity flower crumpled like a "before" penis in a Viagra commercial. Just what I needed after a long day of work. Luckily, I am petty, and I have means of retaliation. Tomorrow, I'm getting him up at 8, and we're breaking out the 3 lb weights. Let's see who's wilting then!!! Mwahaha.

Is that wrong?